We talk about what we do at the office, but for many professionals what we “do” is often a function of what we say or write. Certainly the substance of what we talk about is critical, but the messages we actually deliver are influenced by our word choice and delivery style.
In other words, it’s not enough to know your stuff. How you talk about it can greatly influence the way you are perceived by your colleagues, your boss and your customers. Your speech might make you sound confident, capable and trustworthy. On the other hand, your manner of speaking might detract from your achievements and undercut your credibility.
If you want to knock down potential barriers to your success, take the time to listen to yourself. Consider keeping quick notes on the phrases you hear yourself using. Better yet, find a partner and take notes on each other’s language. Or find a tactful reason to tape some meetings, and compare your speech with that of other participants.
If you’re wondering whether your communication patterns may impact your professional progress, consider these suggestions:
- It depends on the culture. In this big country, acceptable patterns of speech vary from region to region and from industry to industry. Phraseology that sounds brisk and direct in New York might sound rude and crude in North Dakota. The venue of your conversations may determine whether you are wise to use profanity, slang or even sports metaphors. To communicate effectively, be conscious of the speech patterns in the room, and stay within clearly acceptable parameters.
- Use the active voice. As you may recall from your school days, a verb is “active” when it expresses an action performed by its subject, like “the team finished the project.” With a passive verb, the action is performed upon the subject, as in “the project was finished by the team.” Whether you’re speaking or writing, your statements will be more direct, vigorous and clear if you use the active voice.
- It’s not always about you. If you want to sound like a leader, don’t begin your statements with phrases that start with “I”, like “I think that…” or “I just want to say…” You’ll tend to sound weak and uncertain if you frequently use “I” in sentences that aren’t about you. “This would work” is a stronger statement than “I think this would work.”
- Don’t ask “why.” No matter how genuine your interest or concern, people may become defensive if you ask, “why did you do that?” Questions starting with “why” can sound accusatory. You may get better results if you rephrase a “why” question to start with a phrase like, “what was the objective…?”
- No “buts.” If you often use “but” to link two thoughts, you may tend to generate conflict. For example, this sentence suggests that Mary and I have conflicting plans: “I need to make this delivery but Mary wants the car.” Alternatively, by simply replacing “but” with “and” I can set up an opening for Mary and I to coordinate our plans.
- Don’t hedge. Avoid blurring your message and sabotaging yourself with needless disclaimers or apologies. Don’t use phrases like, “it’s just my opinion,” or “I guess my question is.” Get to your point quickly, and don’t belittle yourself along the way.
- Cut the big words. To make your point clearly, don’t use a big word when a small one will do. Consider “use” instead of “utilize,” “active” instead of “proactive,” and “idea” instead of “conceptualization.”
- Silence can be, uh, golden. It’s OK to pause and think for a second. A bit of silence is preferable to relying on meaningless filler words and sounds, like “um,” “you know,” and “like,” as in “this is, like, cool.”
- Spare the “very.” Overused but vague modifiers like “really” and “very” provide little information. If you want to make a point, be more precise. For example, “it was really a very good report” doesn’t say much. A better way to offer praise is to be more specific, as in “the report was particularly helpful because it offered detailed solutions.”